Misogyny, domestic violence, mass murder.

22 Jul

(Originally posted to the Community section of MyMedia–added footnote)

(My apologies for the lack of commentary for this link–not up to it, for many reasons¹)

On the relationship between misogyny, domestic violence, and mass murder:

“1 in 4 women expected to be a victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in her lifetime.”

“We raise our boys with an acceptance that violence will be part of their behaviors (’boys will be boys’), while teaching them to repress all feelings except for anger (’boys don’t cry’), in a society which objectifies girls and women,” she explained. “While problematic in and of itself (’patriarchy hurts men too’), we see that abusers overwhelming come from abusive background, and thus only replicate patterns they have learned during their childhoods, patterns which, while criminal, are ultimately reinforced in a number of ways in a masculine culture of violence.”


¹ My mother had a cerebral embolism a couple of days ago, and has been in the emergency room since. She’s stable, and will remain in hospital at least a couple of days longer, under observation. Eventually, if everything goes well, her prognosis is fairly decent, considering her age, though she may never recover full mobility.

I’m 4500 2000² or so miles away, but fortunately everyone else in the family is pitching in, so she has not been alone for even one minute, and plans are already being considered to ensure she receives proper care, 24/7, once she’s released, so that’s good. It allows me to continue to function almost as normally as I usually do (not quite, but faking it well enough…mostly).

However, I’m also very angry; none of the many doctors who have seen her, repeatedly, for the past few months, took a minute to consider than her sudden and baffling memory lapses could be anything but dementia. None of that, “let’s make sure” shit for them, no sirree. Now that they had to do studies, to find out why she had convulsions and stopped breathing, it turns out she’s been having smaller embolisms for a while.

² Sorry about that–it’s a lot closer, and still, impossibly far.

7 Responses to “Misogyny, domestic violence, mass murder.”

  1. Valancy 22/07/2016 at 7:13 AM #

    Not about the article – which is very important nonetheless; but I am so sorry to hear about your mother. It’s so hard to know what to say at these times – but having been through health crisis & near death with both my mum and my dad, I hope I do understand (a little) what you may be going through.

    Although I am far away – my thoughts and wishes are with you all.

    • azteclady 22/07/2016 at 7:37 AM #

      (((Valancy))) Thank you, I do appreciate it. Online friends are true friends, and it helps to know there are people out there who care.

  2. Lori 22/07/2016 at 4:40 PM #

    Az, there’s nothing worse than loving someone and not being there with them. Your Mom is in my thoughts and you always are.

    I’ll say as an aside, I recently worked a short time with an amazing doctor who diagnosed cancer quickly in a young person who you’d never assume had cancer and treated another young man for a ‘hidden’ issue that again, would have been missed by most doctors. I’m finding that I have less and less faith in the medical field because the really brilliant doctors are few. The rest are attendants, doing the time to make the bucks.

    • azteclady 22/07/2016 at 4:46 PM #

      Unfortunately, too many people do see the medical profession as a money maker, rather than a vocation.

      And thank you, Lori *hug* You know I appreciate you. Give Miz Mollie a hug from me, please.

  3. SuperWendy 23/07/2016 at 4:08 PM #

    I’m so sorry to hear about your Mom! And doubly tough for you being so far away, but I’m glad you have plenty of family there who can look in on her, and begin to make necessary arrangements. Still it’s tough. All the hugs in the world to you.

    • azteclady 23/07/2016 at 4:17 PM #

      Thank you, Miz Wendy; I have been getting regular updates, and seems everything that can be done, is being done. Plus, I’m told that she’s reacting well to treatment, and her prognosis for cognitive/memory issues has improved. It’s hard, but it is what it is, you know?


  1. Wild emotional ride for the past two weeks. | Her Hands, My Hands - 05/08/2016

    […] don’t talk much about my family online, but I did mention two weeks ago that my mother had a convulsive episode that lander her in the hospital. When I wrote that, it seemed that the event, while serious, would […]

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