A loving god

30 Oct

(I would advise any religious/devout readers to skip this one)

Today, as I was driving home from work, letting the mind wander while waiting for the traffic light to change, I noticed something about the car tags in this here hellhole that I hadn’t noticed before. You have the state in smallish letters, the the tag number in LARGE letters, then you have…”IN GOD WE TRUST” in smaller capital letters.

And I realized why I don’t.

Trust in god, that is.

I was raised Catholic, and some four decades and change ago, I had my first strong disagreement with The Church, when I argued that sending stillborn children to Limbo for eternity, simply because they die before birth and thus are never baptized, is a cruelty no loving god would inflict on the children they created.

My faith in the god of my mother (and her mother, and so on), never grew beyond tepid after that, and adulthood promptly took care of most of what little remained.

But there was always a little seed, a tiny, flickering light of hope that there was something bigger than humanity, something better, something to look up to.

And now that small flickering light is no more.

It is not even that, if there is a god, he allows innocents to suffer illness and pain, either from genetic or “luck of the draw” disorders (from cystic fibrosis to cancer and everything in between)–and the platitude that “he doesn’t burden us with more than we can carry” is cruel on its own, because under a loving god, babies shouldn’t be born dying.

It’s not only that, if there is a god, they allow humans to inflict untold suffering on those immediately around them–children, parents, partners, neighbors are all too often abused, tortured and killed, all over the world, over the most insignificant of justifications, or for no reason at all.

What finished off any hope in me that there is any sort of omnipotent loving god out there, is seeing how the few are gleefully destroying the world and threatening the existence of all of humanity (and much of life on Earth), and how those few grow fat on the suffering of those they are literally killing off.

No loving, merciful god would allow humanity’s purposeful, gleeful cruelty towards humanity’s most vulnerable without intervening–free will be damned.


4 Responses to “A loving god”

  1. ArtK 30/10/2018 at 6:22 PM #

    Raise these issues and you get either “how dare you question God?” or “God has a plan; we can’t know what it is, but He has a plan.” My thought: Yeah, so does the kid pulling the wings off of flies. Lots of plans, none of them good.

    Some other things that bug me. First, and foremost, is attributing natural disasters on God being pissed at someone for something; aside from the fact that these disasters kill lots of people who hate whatever that something is (and therefore should be in God’s favor), but the fact that His aim and timing are so awful. Gay marriage in California? Ok, time for a tsunami in Indonesia.

    A subset of that is when a disaster strikes and someone survives, they give God all the credit. Not the folks who rescued them, just God. Completely ignoring the fact that God let all the *other* people die. Talk about being egotistical. “I’m so special, God saved me. Sucks to be the rest of you!”

    • azteclady 30/10/2018 at 6:51 PM #

      Yes, yes, yes, and yes, to all this.

      (and so good to “see” you, my friend–sending hugs to Z and G and M through you)

      • ArtK 02/11/2018 at 10:46 AM #

        Good to ‘see’ you too. I hope things are going as well as they can. I’ll pass the hugs along!


  1. Wherever you go, there you are. | Her Hands, My Hands - 19/11/2021

    […] because I was raised Catholic, perhaps because I can’ t put any faith in a divine being that allows the random suffering of children (from illness to war to familial or institutional abuse), the reason is moot. I, quite simply, […]

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