“Unrealistic expectations”

(Originally posted in the community section at MyMedia)

I’ve said it before, here and elsewhere: genre romance is the single most lucrative branch of publishing, and has been for nigh a century. In these days of shrinking profit, genre romance *still* bails out ‘literary’ fiction, by a mile.

Yet, it still gets shit on, constantly, everywhere. The media is generally shitty towards genre romance, with very few outlets even hiring someone half-conversant with the genre to write the ubiquitous ‘think’ pieces around Valentine’s Day, or during the June wedding season, or even to recommend summer ‘beach’ reads.

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#notallmen – just enough of them.

Originally posted to the Community section of MyMedia

“Why do you keep hating on misogynistic white cis men? #notallmen, you know?”

If fewer white cis men were passing so many laws that directly attack women, and if the majority of people proposing and supporting such laws were *not* misogynistic white cis men, I probably would stop.

Making lists, checking them twice.

This post has existed in draft form for…well, yikes, almost two full years. Something came to light yesterday, that made me come back to it. And you, lucky readers, get to read my thoughts.

As I’ve mentioned before here and elsewhere, I do have a list of authors who, in my opinion, behave badly.¹  And, since my time, emotional labor, energy, and money, are limited, I quite simply refuse to even try their work. It’s still, at least in this small area, a free country.

By the same token, I have a much, much, much longer list of incredible people who are authors who will always get my support.

Did you know…? (Women’s pain, once more)

(Originally posted to the Community section of MyMedia)

Who here knew that men can be diagnosed with–and die from–breast cancer?

Oh, you didn’t. Well, it’s true.

It is a hell of a lot less common than prostrate cancer, but it happens. It has also had some pretty visible crusaders among famous/celebrity women, and it’s seen often as a blameless illness: it’s in the genes, so if anyone in your family had it at some point, it’s not your ‘fault’ you got it.

But, what about vulvodynia or vaginismus?

First, who is just hearing about these for the first time right now?

Yeah, thought so.

Collective racial violence in the US

This is a collection of resources on the long and terrible history of racial violence against blacks in the US. Originally a twitter thread, starting here, by Professor Walter D Greason. I have added a couple more links, for specific instances mentioned by other people, as I’ve remembered them.

There is a lot–A LOT–of deeply disturbing imagery in these links and videos. This is what white people have done to black people in this country, without remorse–indeed, feeling morally justified and protected by law–for centuries.

(Note: I’m including some links at the end, regarding racial violence toward other groups)

I will continue to update this as I learn more.

“Every (fetus’) life is sacred”

(Originally posted to the Communty section of MyMedia)

In the great abortion debate, a couple of things are usually omitted by the “every fetus’ life is sacred!”* brigade.

For one, men can–and do–impregnate women and walk away with zero consequences, all the time.

Yes, yes, yes; women can demand paternity tests and whatever, and go to court, and spend YEARS trying to get some child support from them. A hell of a lot of the time, fathers shrug their financial (and emotional) responsibilities off, and go on their merry way.

And you know what? No one ever says to men of any age, “Abortion is murder, stop having sex!” while all over the place, men will snark at women, “if you don’t want to get pregnant, stop having sex, you slut!”

Advice to parents–from a misogynist

(Originally posted to the Community section of MyMedia)

Now for some levity.

Male writer for Slate tweets, “Advice to parents: teach your daughters to say “no” firmly and mean it. Men sense women’s willingness to yield.”¹

Women on twitter: Do you even know how many women are killed by men they said “NO” (firmly and clearly) every year?

Male writer: ‘Actually’ I wasn’t talking about sexual assault, I meant like Maxine Waters exchange with Steven Mnuchin.²

Women: Oh, you mean when she had to repeat 39 times “Reclaiming my time” as he spoke over her; then when she had to ask the MAN with the gavel to explain the rules to Mnuchin after she had just explained them to him, and STILL he didn’t actually answer the question?

Male writer: These women and their “twitter outrage!”³